Translating Japanese into English

I decided recently that one of the professions I'd like to pursue is translating Japanese into English. As part of my studies I think attempting to do simple translations will help me acquire new words and better understand sentence structure.

Periodically I will pick some Japanese text from the wild and attempt to translate it. For today I've chosen an Amazon review of the video game Red Dead Redemption. Here are the results to my first draft. I will have it reviewed by a Japanese friend and post corrections later this week.

You can view the original review here.

My goal in translating this review is to strike a balance between accuracy and literalism. I guess that's one of the difficulties in translation work but I know little of the subject. Anyway, here goes!

プレイし始めたばかりなので基本的な部分をレビューさせてもらいます。
Although I just started playing I'd like to do a basic review.
* This is a very humble sounding sentence. It literally says something like "please let me review the game for you" which sounds very strange in English.

まずグラフィックですが、オープンワールドのゲームとしては、かなり綺麗で作り込まれています。
First of all the graphics are really nice for an open-world game.

アサシンクリードほど緻密だとは感じませんでしたが、そのぶんかなりマップが広く、入れる建物も多くて、中までしっかり作り込まれています。
It doesn't feel as detailed as Assasin's Creed but the world map is pretty big. There are many buildings that you can enter and they are detailed inside as well.

遠景描写もかなり細かくハッキリ見えます。
The background environment is really detailed and clear.

GTA4で不満だったフレームレートも滑らかになっています。
I was disappointed by the frame rate in GTA4 but they smoothed it out in this game.

操作性もGTA4と比べるとストレスがなく、流行りの壁をよじ登るアクションがあるのも嬉しいです。
The controls are stress-free compared to GTA4. I'm also glad that they added the ability to climb over walls like many other new games.

牛や馬などの動物が見た目も動きもかなりリアルです。
The animation of animals like cows and horses is very realistic.

ただ序盤のミッションで小さくて可愛いウサギを狩らなくちゃいけないのは生理的にキツかったです。
Even the first mission of the game where you have to hunt cute little rabbit is psychologically intense.

Conclusion

Thanks for reading and if you can offer any comments or corrections it would be much appreciated.